Paris, Hilton, In Person!

I just had breakfast with the President. That's THE President. As in "of the United States." The Chief Strategery Person, himself. Even though roughly 4,000 others were there with us in the International Ballroom of the Washington, D.C. Hilton for the 52nd National Prayer Breakfast, I felt the Commander-in-Chief and I made a "connection" in some small way. Maybe it was the way he looked at me when he said, "Pass the jelly." At least that's what I think he said. He was a table or twelve away from me, though I've been an expert lip reader ever since Jon Gruden became coach of the Oakland *#%&! Raiders. Nonetheless, it was nice of the President to say he'd pick up the check for breakfast and put it in the new budget.

Anyway, there were assorted dignitaries from more than 150 countries, as well as myriad U.S. Congressional leaders, Cabinet members, and a parade of people you'd expect to see at such functions, including James Dobson and the exquisitely-coiffed Cal Thomas (who's hair arrived shortly before he did), who together successfully lobbied to remove Janet Jackson from the program.

Instead, we were led in praise by Twila Paris, who managed to remain fully clothed for most of her performance. There was an awkward moment, however, when new/old Redskins coach Joe Gibbs ripped the lapel off of featured speaker J.C. Watts' suit. Gibbs later apologized, saying he thought Watts' wardrobe was still of the tearaway variety that he wore when he quarterbacked the Oklahoma Sooners to a national championship.

Still, a good time was had by all. And I must say it was encouraging to see our nation's leaders pause from their daily grind of character assassination and reckless spending to unite in a spirit of love, which they're counting on to cover the multitude of their sins.